Alone in a cold and lonley universe

Just Blowing the dust off of this old blog...Pfffffftttttt....There done it. Right then, to work. Bomb Culture the Band is dead. it is no more, but Bomb Culture the blog is still here (suprisingly) and although I suspect no-one is reading this I shall endavour to add my own narcasistic thoughts and opinions out into the cold and cruel web.
Pretty much got bugger all to say at the moment though so I'll just kick off with a video of the title song from The Boy From Space, which as it happens, rocks. Hard

This is the End, Beautiful Friends, The End.

It must be fairly obvious to anyone who has glanced past these pages in the past year thart absolutley fuck all has been going on with Bomb Culture and so as all things must end, it is time for the finale of BC.
We've had five (or is it six years) of beats and bouncy toons but due to a case of Musical Indifference, the Big Old BC has decided to call it quits. The moooooozic is still available all over the net and we'll be putting up a few as yet unrealeased tracks in the near future, but our last major sign off will be as part of the Soundtrack to British independent film The Oracle, so keep your peepers peeled for that when it comes along.
In the next month or so, this here blog will transmogrify with a shiny new face lift as we begin to throw articles at you as well as other shit based on un-informed personal opinion and ranting hatred of right wing values. An original idea on the internet, I'm sure you will agree.
So for now let's not say goodbye, just perhaps fuck off and thanks for not coming to any gigs or butying any tracks (unless of course you did, then thank you, you lovley piece of ass).

BOMB CULTURE - Thank you and goodnight
x

NEXT GIG!!

Giggae!!!!

After many a moon of being trapped underneath a heavy weight, Bomb Culture are emerging back into the sunny sunshine of Gig Land!!! With the oh-so close arrival of the new LP and BRAND NEW VIDEO (Big up to everyone who came along last Saturday night to help make it happen by the way)..The Big Old BC are super-dooper happy to announce....

Le Pub.....Newport....December 11th 8.30 -2.......

With massive support from the GLC Supporting No Sleep Police, The screaming balck meatl of Fourth Autmn and the blissed out dance vibe of Project Serpo!!!!!!

Get thy arse down there people and we'll br right back with more news....

Bomb Culture - Sucking it down so you don't have to

Squidly Didly

Nothing new to report on the band front so here’s some blathering on about nothing to fill the void in your empty lives....

Dead Celebs....... TV Chef Keith Floyd, TV Jockey Fred ‘Hi-De-Hi’ Bowness, and Patrick ‘No Put’s Baby in a corner’ Swayze have all gone to that big TV in the sky , where I’m sure they will cook, dance and ride ponies for all eternity. BomB Culture Salutes You!!!!!

Meanwhile back on Terra Firma those darn Americana’s are trying to embargo Scottish goods as they had the decency to show compassion to a dying man. But, wait! I hear them yelp, he was a terrorist...etc.etc...Quite apart from the dubious evidence behind the conviction, isn’t compassion and mercy what supposedly makes us different from murderers and their nefarious kin?

But those damn Yankees are once again full of righteous indignation and who are we to question the giant intellect of the great American public? So let’s join in by renaming a few Scottish products to align ourselves with America’s New World of the Pure.

Tweed shall be renamed Interconnecting Patriot Stripes

Kilts will now be known as Cowardly Fag Skirts.

Tossing the Caber will change to Stroking the Freedom Log

Haggis is to become A Sack of Liberty Guts

The Phrase ‘Many a Mikle Macks a Muckle’ will not be translated as even in the current climate it is still as relevant today as it was when that bloke from the Professionals said it on a Supermarket advert in the Seventies.

Lulu will be subject to a hostile takeover. From behind.

Finally in a gesture of shoulder-to-shoulder solidarity with our American masters...sorry,...allies...We shall cut Scotland free from this Sceptic Isle, and let it drift aimlessly around the World like some kind of penny-pinching, skirt-wearing red-haired sea borne pariah, where hopefully it will be boarded by Somalian Pirates and sold for it’s rich tartan mines on the international market.
Yes, it may seem harsh, but someone has to do it otherwise it won’t be done, and then where would we be?

Tune in next time when we shall have absolutely no new band news and more inane crap, although we will be limbering up for the annual BC Pickle contest!!! Oh Yeah! Get your hot vinegar ready people for the time to pickle is almost upon us.

For no other reason than it's very clever, we leave you with this awesome Fanmade trailer for a Thundercats movie...enjoy!



Bomb Culture – Fingering the banjo strings of excellence with the long thin digits of love.

Bring Me the Head of Phil Collins

Yep, been away for quite some time from this ‘ere blog ,and if there’s anyone out there still interested in the pitiful ramblings of a socially maladjusted pervert on the edge of sanity, then welcome back!

So what’s been going on since we had our last little chin wag? Well Michael Jackson’s snuffed it (Proving a genuine ‘Meh’ from me), America has called the NHS ‘Evil and Orwellian’ (Showing both their ignorance and misinformed grasp of literature) ,and Piers Morgan is still a cunt.

In the midst of all these shenanigans however Bomb Culture have been banging away at some new tunes in an effort to thrust them from their slumbering status and thrust them into the bright shiny world of the Gig.

Yep it’s been a Loooooong time for BC to be off the gig scene and frankly, it’s our fault, we’re a lazy bunch of fuckers who couldn’t be arsed so if you have any gig offers then get them rolling in.

So what have we been doing then, eh? EH? Well, as we speak the very finalest of final touches are being put to the oh-so long delayed album and the accompanying Video.

Now, I can hear the collective,’ Yeah right, you’ve been saying that for ages’ tone reverberating across BC Towers, but this time my little internet chum it’s actually true and as if to prove it we will soon be announcing an actual launch date!!!!! Yep that’s fucking right! A launch Date.

To add to this little party, the BC Website will receive an enormous overhaul, meaning that this old blog of ours will probably migrate over to the Main BC site (which itself will be re-vamped). Not sure how it’ll work and all that gubbins but keep on checking back and we’ll let ya know.

I leave you with the words of the late great Mrs. Slocombe ‘Oooooh! Something, something something Pussy something something .’

Aaaaaaand....Queue the Hilarity

Bomb Culture – Uh? What, sorry did someone say something?

Coming soon...

Bomb Culture - Prepare to begin...

Giz

Bomb Culture would like to pay tribute to a very dear friend who passed away last week. Geraint ‘Giz’ Jones was a friend since childhood and as such shared his love, laughter and life with us for many, many years. We will miss him greatly and our respects and love go to his family, his friends and anyone who had the fortune to share time with him.


Bomb Culture – Goodbye Giz. We will never forget you. xxx

Watch me for I am a Movie

Well as BC are still in the studio beavering away at the album and preparing the soon-to-be-unveiled Video, it's been a bit quiet out there in News land . So as a little gift to you (and because we ain't got shit to tell ya at the mo', here's a movie!! Oh yes indeedy for your delectation and sexual gratification here is the full uncut original Vincent Price classic....The Last Man on Earth!! Based on the original I am Legend it kicks the arse out of Will Smith's massivley overpriced opus...Also it's in the public doamin so you can just watch this little sucker for absolutley bupkiss, free.


We return velly soon with actual news but until then....Vincent Price and The Last Man on Earth! Enjoy!(It may take a minute or two to load so be patient)


Bomb Culture -The Alpha and Omega

BACK ONCE AGAIN WITH THE RENEGADE HAMSTERS!

Well Gordon Bennett it's been a while, and our profuse appologise for that, but with the winter chill a-whipin' round our knees the big old BC took a well desreved hibernate-ery break after the massive success of the NYE gig. And what a night it was, our good chums Cakehole Presley ripped up the stage with their folky-bluesy raucusness leaving the way clear for some smoking hot beat filled mayhem from the boys and gal of Bomb Culture.

Yes, some utter tit did manage to chuck a brick through the window at the end of the night, but as we were far away at another party by then, we can rather smugly wash our hands of any responsibility and put it down to just another roaming venomous chav that couldn't hold his alcopop.

So, where are the BC at right now, I hear you squeal....Well, believe it or not, the mighty BC are actually in t'studio mixing and recording the oft mentioned and tediously rumoured Bomb Culture long player!!! Oh yes, me little chickade's, BC's first collection of golden greats is just a month or two from finalisation. As an added bonus we've drafted in the expertise of Mr Waldorf from Stadeler and Waldorf to help with the production, and to polish up the trhobbing beats of pleasure. You lucky people!!

Also, to make up for the recent lack of communication the next post (this time next week folks) will feature a link to the brand new vid , with a brand new remix of St. Marys Beat!! Oh God I think I've just come a little.

So with all this activity surley you could find it within your hearts to forgive our communication transgression and give us your sexy aural love again...You could? Great!

In other news....Since we've been away a number of genius's (should that be geni?) have passed from our shores that didn't get the customary BC salute. So without further ado....

Art lovin' mate of plastacine, Tony Hart

Rumpole writing wonky eyed curmodgen John Mortimer

Clanger and Bagpuss creatin' gorgeous bloke Oliver Postage

One-joke spasm inducing flat cap wearing carry on veteran Jack Douglas

Bomb Culture Salutes You!!!!!!

And in one final unprecedented move, today sees two salutes!! Dear God can it be true? Well yes, as this week sees the 50th anniversary of the death of the awesome Buddy Holly we add one more to the great roster of people saluted by us. So....Buddy Holly BC Salutes YOu!!!!!

NEXT TIME: New BC VID!!! More Album NEWS!!....AND... the premier blog entry for the first lady fo Bomb Culture, Professor Krisps!!Keep 'em peeled people.

Bomb Culture - Chewing horrible words of hate through lovley lips of love

It's about Time

Yes, we’ve been offline for sometime but fear not, as if you cast your peepers below you shall see news of the very next giggae. A full update is on it’s way, but for now, here’s what’s up next…The Landsdowne, Canton, Cardiff, NEW YEARS EVE. Cakehole Presley – Bomb Culture – Steve Staedler (Staedler & Waldorf solo set).BE THERE!!!!

Bomb Culture- Being lazy about updating the blog but still saving the World one beat at a time

Tufty Rocks!

After watching the start of Autumn Watch last night, it occurred to me that there might not be anything in life quite as hypnotic as watching a squirrel on an assault course. There is surely nothing finer than a hearty smoke in one hand, an aged single malt in the other, and the sight of a furry- tailed-nut-nibbler scrambling across a washing line. But is watching a squirrel on a washing line the very best thing that you could be doing on a cold wintery night? Well not if it’s November 20th, your in Newport, S.Wales and MINT productions have anything to say about it ! OH Yeah, once again we’re starting off with a massive plug for the upcoming MINT @ MEZE Night, featuring the VERY BEST Cardiff bands around at the mo’. Except absolutely NO substitute people!

While we’re on the subject of awesome things to watch, let us introduce you to our decadent chums from the city of Londinium in the town of En-ger-Land, the one and only Bow Mods. A twisted Cabaret of dance and debauchery and Berlin-style Burlesque they are well worth having a look at…and in fact you can right here with theirBRAND New vid for, ‘Seventeen Weeks’, a touching lament to lead singer, PCS’s need for a fag and a shag. You shall not be disapointed...

'SEVENTEEN WEEKS'. Bow Mods present...



POST 200 MASSIVE 200 PENCE GIVEAWAY was….. Nesta Wyre from Gabalfa for her stunning entry ‘ Can I have the money please.’ Admittedly it’s not the greatest competition entry ever but as she was the only applicant she wins!! (Bet your kicking yourself for not entering now eh?). So huge congratulations to Mrs. Wyre, the £2 will be waiting for you at the very next BC Gig which just so happens to be the afore-mentioned MINT @MEZE!!! HUZZAH!

And finally..In lieu of rant we round up this weeks news using just 3 words to comment on each story…Brand and Ross –Offensive Arrogant Twats…Mandelson – Slimy Devious Liability…The Met in Court for Shooting innocent people…Desperate arse-covering lies…The Return of Autumn Watch –Lovely beardie Oddie! Horray! Yep, as faintly middle-class and middle-aged as it is, Autumn Watch can’t fail to warm the cockles and massage the tingly-feeling gland! Don’t believe me? Then as I said earlier, get yourself a whisky, a smoke and tune in to a squirrel on an assault course. Fuck the Recession and the world turning to shit Autumn Watch rocks!!!

Bomb Culture – The funkiest of Gibbons

POST 200 -THE TWO HUNDRED-ETH-EST POST OF ALL TIME!!!

THREE YEARS! TWO BAND LINE-UPS! ONE ARSE THROBBING BLAST OF SOUND! HUNDREDS OF GIGS!TWO BROKEN LEGS!THREE BABIES! NUMEROUS BC SALUTES! ONE ROBBERY! FOUR BA-ZILLION BADLY WRITTEN WORDS!......IT’S THE BOMB CULTURE BLOGSPOT’S 200TH POST !!

Oh yeah, babies that’s right, it exactly 200 posts of ill-informed rants and band news ago, that we started this here blog to give you nubile young thangs all you need to know about Cardiff’s very most bestest Beat merchants. So let’s kick off the celebrations with news of the next gig, the enormous return of those promoters of taste and virtue….. MINT! Yep, get ready, coz here comes MINT 2 ….

So Who’s playing then eh? eh?…..

MAIN STAGE

Julian Liberator - A thumping set from London's finest acid techno party people, Stay Up Forever.www.myspace.com/stayupforevercollective

Staedeler and Waldorf - live quality dance floor filth from the dirty beat muppets www.myspace.com/staedlerandwaldorf

Bomb Culture - Yes!!! YES!!! YES!!!l

http://www.bombculture.co.uk/

No Sleep Police - Straight outta blackwood with kick ass hip hop to rock & shock the nation

www.myspace.com/nosleepingpolicing

Project Serpo - The best in electro acoustic fun and bleeps

www.myspace.com/projectserpo51

Dr Nitrogen - On the decks with the man from Critical Mass
www.myspace.com/drnitrogen

But that’s not all for there is also…THE ROOF GARDEN, with The very best of Dubstep on the brand new roof terrace featuring:

Mondo

www.myspace.com/djmondo23,
1man dub
www.myspace.com/1mandub
Slippers
Errr...well he doesn't have a Myspace account, so you'll just have to pretend.

And finally Visual pleasure will be unleashed from Bomb Culture’s very own Visual slut…

The Darkside Gallery

http://www.thedarksidegallery.co.uk/

We are also enormously chuffed to mention, that the deliciously bouncy Bomb Culture track, ‘Where ya Goin?’, will be turning up on the extreme sports show, Freesports on 4. Not sure which episode yet but we’re in there somewhere (probably as someone does something EXTREME, or some such nonsense). So keep your ears peeled people , as BC takes it to the TV.

We continue the POST 200 celebrations by re-visiting one of our most popular features (It’s not popular at all).. Yep, it’s competition time! As we’re celebrating 200 posts we thought it only fitting that we give away BIG MONEY! So here’s your chance of winning TWO HUNDRED pence! All you need to do is follow the instructions below and you could be dining out at the very best fish and chip Restaurant in your area! It’s so easy even a child could enter. A really stupid diseased child n’all.

Simply go to the comment box and leave a comment stating why you should have the 200 pence on offer. You may need the cash for bus fare to visit a sick aunt, or maybe you’re a tramp and need a couple of tins of Special Brew. Perhaps you have a scabby disease and need a pack of rubber jonnies so you don’t spread your mucky filth about the place. Remember the more pathetic and needy you are, the more likely it is you’ll win! It really is that simple!! Good Luck!

And finally….Like some hot celebration on celebration action we’d also like to give great big Happy Birthday! to our Visual Slut, Mr Sul of The Dark Side Gallery. The Salt N’ Pepper haired wonder will not also be displaying his moving images at the MINT 2 but also displaying his canvas-based terrorism at the Dolphin Hotel, Swansea on November 30th as part of the Heroes and Villians Comic Con! Here’s the poster…

So, as the financial world crumbles and falls into the capitalist pit of it’s own doings, and we bend over and bail them out, BC hurls the bad tidings to one side and gives you reason to dance at the end of the World. As we’ve always said, when the shit hit’s the fan it’s time to dance in the spray.

And as one final Celebration present here's President Bush (Senior) throwing up on the Chinese Ambasador! Enjoy!

Next time – An in-depth investigation into the financial markets - As the Isle of Dogs Building Society collapses, we ask, is it time to call in the retrievers?

Bomb Culture salutes all of our Reader(s)!!!

How to make a Lion go Woof!

Now before we start, I'd just like to appolgise for the random and rambling nature of this blog post. There, now no-one can feel guilty as you have been warned..

Whilst idly sitting drunk in front of my TV the other night, I saw a listing for a show that I was sure would be an excellent all round family experience. Eagerly I tuned in, but was disappointed to find that my whisky be-fuddled eyes had tricked me and I had misread Wildlife on One as Wildlife on Fire (damn my drunken TV Watching).

Now, far be it for me to encourage the populace to set light to members of the Animal Kingdom, but what could possibly be better than seeing a flammable Lion hunting down a petrol soaked Zebra? The inevitable explosion / beast inferno would surely have been the tele-visual highlight of the year and at least 10 billion times better than watching the X Factor. Seriously, Danni Minogue? Sheryl Cole? Musical Experts? It seems all you need to do is go armed with a story that your mother/sibling/spouse/dog has just died, sing in that faux-wibbly Mariah Carey way, and hey presto you’re a star. Of course you also have to state that being famous and rich has also been your lifetime ambition and that if you don’t beat the 7 or 8 million people in this freak show you’ll be a loser for the rest of your life. Well guess what, you have no need to beat 7 or 8 million people, you’re a sad twat already. Good luck with that.

Personally I think we could mix my Wildlife on Fire show with The X Factor and produce something really interesting… Simply douse the contestants in petrol, strap a hundred lit candles to a hungry lion, place them in Danni MInogue’s skull (or any other large empty space) and roll the cameras. Hey presto, instant TV show! This principle can also be attached to Strictly Come Dancing – just substitute Danni Minogue’s skull for a ballroom and make sure the lion is wearing sequins.

But, why oh why are blathering on about such things Oh Mr. Bomb Culture person? Well, I’m glad I asked, as apart from the soon-to-be-announced line-up for the 2nd MINT @ MEZE (Coming real soon…With a real cracker of a headliner..) , Bomb Culture are stuck in the limbo land of ‘Some Fucker nicked our Equipments-ville’. This of course means that we’ve had to put the whole recording/ jamming thang on hiatus whilst we light our torches and hunt down the thieving bastards , or failing that just glumly buy more guitars…Grrrrrrrr.

Anyhoooo normal service will be resumed next week with the big celebration that is …POST 200!!! What is POST 200? Well come on back next week and you may just find out….Then again, you may not, sort of depends really.

Bomb Culture – Weevils on Fire, rolling down the Road

The Good, The Bad and The filthy thieving scum

Some Good News and some Bad News today, first the bad:

Appologies to break the mood of loveliness and stuff but some thieving piss-licking -shit-sucking- scum-fuckers broke into the studio on Saturday morning and made off with our Bass, lead guitar, a bag of leads and a sound card. Now, far be it from us to judge the detective skills of the Cardiff Constabulary but just in case and in the interest of the slim chance that someone would know these motherfuckers, (and the fact that they haven’t actually bothered to turn up to check out the crime after 2 fucking days) today we ask the question ‘Have you seen These Twats?’ Maybe you recoginse the seedy rat features, or perhaps the hideous Addidas jumper that the lead Cunt seems to be wearing with little shame…

If you have any idea who these chavy cock-holes are please email us on bombculture@gmail.com or leave a comment in the comment box. If you’d just like to leave a insult about these mother-less father-fucking- herpes-lipped- spunk –suckers then pop that also in the comment box and we’ll pass on your thoughts just as soon as we catch up with them.

On a lighter note (and as a way to stop myself obsessing over the filthy pig-fuckers who robbed us blind ) we must stop to give a salute to one of the finest actors of his generation, Mr. Paul Newman who died on the Weekend. Apart from the superb performances( Cool Hand Luke, Hud, The Hustler, Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid..etc..etc) and his massive contribution to defining a style of naturalistic acting that was never fully appreciated (I always think they give Brando, waaaaay too much credit when Newman made consistently better films), his philanthropy and the billions he gave for good causes across the World was way beyond the call of duty. So for all of those things AND for a pretty damn tasty pasta sauce, Paul Newman….Bomb Culture Salutes You!

And finally….
To put a little karma our way in the Good News stakes, It is with enormous pleasure that we welcome into the World …Edita, the newest sibling of our ex-bass hippy-chap Mr Jethro Stevenson and his rather delicious Wife ,Jennie. Massive congratulations to them both and our huge love. after such a shitty weekend it’s an absolute delight to have a wee ray of niceness burst through the cloud of crap. So as a very special addition to the World, Jethro, Jennie and Edita….Bomb Culture Salutes You!!!

BOMB CULTURE - WELL DONE THE HIPPY!